If you thought that a magician could receive a standing ovation in a 1,000-seat theater for a dental floss trick, then you've clearly never been on a cruise. My husband, a magician named Jon, accomplished this extraordinary feat during his 14th performance on one unforgettable cruise. This experience perfectly encapsulated the essence of being a cruise ship entertainer - no matter the circumstances, the show must go on.
Confession time: I used to have a strong aversion to cruises. The idea of living on a colossal vessel, navigating an even more immense ocean, felt paradoxically claustrophobic and vast. I couldn't help but wonder if I'd be better off with my feet planted firmly on solid ground.
However, fate had other plans. A chance encounter with a magician named Jon at the Magic Castle in Hollywood changed my perspective. Fast forward a decade, and I'm now married to that very magician. Over the past ten years, we've crisscrossed the globe together, courtesy of his performances on various cruise lines such as Viking, Seabourn, Oceania, Crystal, Azamara, and Disney. Oh, and I've had the pleasure of sampling waffles on each cruise, so I can confidently tell you which cruise line serves the best batch.
For magicians, being a guest entertainer on a cruise ship is just one of the many ways they make a living. Unlike the dedicated crew who spend months at sea, guest entertainers typically embark for only a week or two before moving on to their next destination. Thanks to Jon's work, we've explored diverse corners of the world, from Antarctica to the Panama Canal, not to mention countless voyages to the Caribbean and Alaska. While we enjoy the same accommodations and dining experiences as passengers, there are some distinctive aspects of our cruise experiences.
One of the key differences for guest entertainers is that we rarely embark and disembark with the same group of passengers. Most of the cruises I've been on involve boarding mid-voyage and leaving before the cruise concludes, allowing us to perform for two different sets of guests. Sometimes, this requires us to journey to remote locations just to catch the ship. I remember one instance when we joined a world cruise; we had to fly from Los Angeles to Santiago, Chile, and then endure a multiple-hour bus ride to the ship. Thirty-six hours after departing home (and taking our final shower), we arrived at the port, where we encountered an hour-long customs delay due to confusion regarding our status: were we crew or guests? (In case you're curious, the answer is guests, but explaining that Jon was an entertainer working on the ship, yet not considered crew, left customs officials understandably perplexed.)
My own designation - "the guest of a guest entertainer" - is even more baffling to many. It also presents the challenge of adhering to a more than century-old law. In 1886, Congress passed the Passenger Vessel Services Act, which prohibits guests from embarking and disembarking at U.S. ports if the ship hasn't visited any "distant foreign ports" in between. As for why this archaic law still exists, that's a story for another day. The good news is that regular guests don't typically feel its impact, as cruise companies meticulously plan compliant itineraries. However, when you're midshipping on, say, an Alaska cruise, you might inadvertently breach this rule. Fortunately for Jon and the cruise lines, this stipulation primarily affects my travel plans, occasionally causing complications, especially when flights have already been booked.
Once we step on board, though, any challenges we faced disappear into the background. Every voyage forms its unique community, and until Jon's first performance, we're indistinguishable from other passengers. However, after his initial show, we become minor celebrities. Jon relishes performing quick card tricks for passengers who approach him, as long as he's not eating or, in recent years, chasing after our toddler.
Among all our trips together, some experiences truly stand out. In 2018, we had the incredible opportunity to cruise to Antarctica, which allowed Jon to proudly claim that he has performed on all seven continents.
Now, Jon has returned to cruise ships, though my travels have dwindled since the arrival of our daughter. Our almost three-year-old has already embarked on five cruises, with many more likely in her future. Our trips have evolved with her presence, but there's nothing quite like watching her watch Jon perform in the theater. We usually stay in the back, and when the audience rises to applaud at the end, she's right there with them, enthusiastically shouting, "Daddy did it!"
And if you're wondering about the best waffles at sea - it's Viking, though Disney's Mickey-shaped waffles have their unique charm too.
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